Last week, I had the great privilege to go to the Women in Youth Ministry Conference at Montreat, sponsored by a great organization called the Youth Cartel. If you didn't know, there aren't a ton of women in Youth Ministry, and even fewer of us who actually stay in youth ministry for long-term careers. I met wonderful women at this conference: together, we ate delicious meals, we laughed at stories of meeting our husbands, we hiked in God's great earth together, we shared stories of hope and stories of struggle, and we prayed for one another. I was not surprised but still saddened to hear the stories of my colleagues in churches where they are constantly in fear that the next budget cut means the end of their job; it was heartbreaking to hear stories of senior pastors and congregations that said, "Adult discipleship is more important than youth discipleship" or "the youth don't care anyway, so why bother doing anything for them?" or "we hired a youth director so we wouldn't have to help with youth group anymore." These statements are symptoms of a sickness found in some of our churches, an ailment that makes youth ministry into a scapegoat or an afterthought. I've worked in these churches, and I can't describe to you how difficult it is to keep your eyes on the work that God is doing when people say discouraging things or you barely have enough energy to keep the boat afloat, let alone steer it in a particular direction.
I am so very grateful for the many many volunteers who give of their time to build relationships with our youth. Our church has indeed been blessed with willing hearts who give generously of their time, talents, and treasures. As we are in stewardship season {groan - not this sermon again}, I thought it might be appropriate for me to share with you some stories of how volunteers in this community have used their time, talents, and treasures to grow and sustain a healthy ministry here at Unity Presbyterian Church, and to extend an invitation to each of you to be a part of this ministry in some way.
Time: the greatest gift
Doubting Thomas
High School Sunday School has been one of the areas of youth ministry that has been struggling this year. Teens are still sleepy at 10:00 am, many having homework, practice, and rehearsal the night before. We have tried a couple of curricula, and none of them are particularly interesting or engaging; our attendance is low, and teachers often say they are not sure whether their lessons are effective or not. One day, the teacher spoke about doubts, reading the story of Doubting Thomas, and she was feeling very much like she had no idea if what she said was interesting to the students or not. As one student prepared to leave, she asked him, "Do you believe this stuff?" The young man turned to her and said, "Yes of course." She responded, "But you still have doubts?" The young man's eyes filled with tears, "Yes. Today's lesson, it was for me." Although sometimes the lessons feel like they might fall flat, the time this teacher has put into teaching Sunday School is invaluable. I feel certain that this is a memory that both the teacher and student will remember for the rest of their lives, and that will inspire discipleship in both of them. The gift of time, whether it's leading Sunday School or helping with Youth Group or going on a trip, is precious and special, it is essential to the building of the gospel.
Sharing Time
One of our Middle School leaders had a group of our 6th grade boys surrounding her, and she asked them candidly what they thought of youth group. One boy said he really loved the games, but he didn't like when we went into small groups and talked. He thought that was boring. The leader thought this sounded pretty normal, but then she saw the look on the other boys' faces.
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"Dude, are you serious? I love small group time."
"Yeah, it's like the one place we get to say what we think."
"It's cool that we get to share with each other."
It's possible that when we move into small group time, we as leaders think that these kids find this time boring or unimportant. Especially when kids are quiet and thoughtful, we can misinterpret this as bored and uninterested. Because our leaders and youth have come consistently, and our kids have felt safe to share, over time we have built very trusting groups who can share openly and honestly with one another. Students have shared fears of bullying, emotional scars from traumatic events, and their own loneliness. All of this is because at least 6 youth leaders carve out one hour of time in their busy schedules to sit and talk and listen to our youth. That is sacred and holy.
Cheerleaders
One Sunday in youth group, one of our students announced that he was trying out for the musical. One of our leaders became very excited at this, asking for the dates of the musical so that she and others could go see the performance. She then asked around the group about sports kids played or instruments they practiced so that we could come and see their games and performances.
"What do you do, [Insert Youth Name[]"
"I'm on the fishing team."
"Let's go see him fish!"
"I mean it's really long and boring, and I don't know where you'd watch from."
"Let's go rent us a boat so we can watch this guy fish!"
Now, I'm sure we've missed a lot of games and performances, but the fact remains: our youth leaders are willing to sacrifice some of their own time to be with the youth. They take text messages for prayer requests, they watch musicals, they give their kids to babysitters so they can spend a weekend skiing with teenagers. This is special. Yes, this requires sacrifice, but the return is so great and so wonderful.
Talents
Homework Help
When I first met one of our youth leaders, he began to talk about Physics and I was instantly bored. Dude, I nearly failed Physics in high school, I work as a pastor, science is definitely not my thing.
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At the first youth group, I was amazed [open mouth, insert foot] as kids walked up to this leader giving him high-fives and hugs. He asked them how their science classes were going, and he made arrangements to help a few of the kids with their Physics homework next week. Each week, I am more and more impressed and amazed at the way this leader gives of his gift of intelligence with these kids each week. At first glance, being good at science might not be a qualifier for working with youth. And maybe you have a gift or talent that doesn't necessarily seem like it would fit with youth. Maybe you think you're too old or too out of touch, too nerdy or too intellectual. When we give them over for God's Kingdom, God uses our gifts in ways perhaps we hadn't imagined. God blesses what we have and uses it to advance his kingdom.
Games Guru
It's a similar story, but different. When I began here, I heard legends of the Games Guru who led games in the Middle School. The legends were that this guy was amazing, the kids loved him, and he was just gifted at leading games. When I met with him for the first time, he put his two hands up in the air and said, "I'm just winging it every week. I have no idea what I'm doing."
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In truth, he was doing a lot more than he gave himself credit for. The group had done about 2 or 3 games on a regular basis, and he criticized himself for not coming up with new material. We tried some new games, we brought in old games, a basketball hoop and four-square court appeared in our parking lot - but bottom-line: this dude is really good at leading games. The kids follow him, he teaches well, he has great energy, and they respect him as a friend and a leader, not an easy balance. Even as he tried to play them down, his gifts for leading kids with games are undeniable.
Maybe you lack confidence in a gift you have. Together, I believe w can help to foster the gifts you have, and help you to use them for the glory of God.
Stepping in
This year, we ran the Angel Tree Bake Sale and the Easter Egg Hunt, both on a relatively short budget of time. I asked the same small group of volunteers to lead these two events, and frankly, they did such an amazing job, I am still in awe of their work. These ladies have tremendous gifts in organization, sending out Sign-Up Geniuses, keeping track of donations, counting donations. And they gave their gifts freely and kindly.These two ministries not only managed to take place this year, they were also great beacons of light and hope to the whole congregation and community.
Treasures
Some stuff people don't want to talk about
So, we never like to talk about the money part, but I'll be brief and to the point. Youth Ministry takes a lot of resources to run. Youth Ministry includes: Sunday School for Middle and High School students, Confirmation, both Youth Groups, mission trips, conferences, fellowship events, a full-time staff person, administrative supplies, and communications to youth and their families. We regularly see between 50 and 70 students each week, and we have contact with more than 150 students and their families. This is a sizable ministry, and it's growing. It requires financial contributions to stay afloat, and of course you know that. Of course, God calls us to be stewards of what we are given, knowing that it is not ours but God's and we should use it for God's pleasure and honor. But we want to make sure that when we give our money or our goods, that they will be used in the ways we want them to be. Here's three major ways that Youth Ministry uses money to make a better ministry:
Summer Trips
I had a youth at a previous church who was only marginally interested in youth group. She was very popular at school, and she had ditched many of her less popular youth group friends to hang out with more popular, party-going teens. She went through the Confirmation class one year, and decided to go on the mission trip, since most of the rest of the class was going. I can't say for sure, but I think Mom might have put her foot down on this one. This young lady entered the trip with perfect makeup and hair, an air of superiority, and a practiced fake laugh. She selected two or three friends and kept the rest of the group at bay by mocking them behind their backs.
By the end of the week, this youth was completely different. She emerged from a job site where she had been digging with a jack-hammer, covered in filth, her hair tossled and dirty, her face pouring with sweat, and a look of determination on her face. This young lady had learned to serve others, to put others before herself. She left having befriended everyone in the group, and although she struggled for a while to balance between her popular friends and her church friends, she eventually made a way to bridge the gap. She cites this mission trip as one of the most transformative experiences of her life.
Each summer, we offer a mission experience and conference experience for both Middle School students and High School students. That makes four trips per year. The cost for these trips is astronomical; without the help of the church a family with one middle schooler and one high schooler who each went to both experiences would cost upwards of $1,000. Because we value the experiences our youth attain on these trips, because we want to hear more stories like the one ascribed above, we contribute a large portion of our budget to making sure that the costs are not astronomical. We additionally have a separate fund you can give to aside from your tithing that goes toward scholarships, so that there will never be a kid who is prevented from going on these trips because they can't afford it.
Communications and Administration
I confess: I am absolutely horrendous at keeping the website up to date and looking nice. If you go to the youth page right now, you will be embarrassed for me, as it contains just a bunch of garbled links and sentences.
It's tough right now. Unity Presbyterian Church has around 1300 members, and, on average, we get around 75 visitors on any given Sunday morning in worship. That's literally more people, let alone members and visitors, than my grandmother's church gets on Christmas Eve. We seem to be in this chemistry experiment, where everything around us is exploding and expanding. I certainly wish I had a better website, and I strongly desire for all of my communications to be clear, concise, and clean-looking. Yet, as the world expands around us, we are scrambling to meet the needs of our community, and our staffing simply hasn't caught up. One of the best pieces of advice I ever got in ministry was this: Lindsay, you were hired to be the Associate Pastor for Youth. They hired you because you have special and unique gifts for that ministry, and that is what you should spend the majority of time not doing what you were called here to do, you are wasting the church's money. I've always liked that: if I spent enough time, I'm sure I could have a superb website and wonderful flyers for every event, but I would have missed time in pastoral care, in bible studies and prayer with youth, and in coming up with creative lessons for youth group. As our church continues to grow, the need for clear, uniform, and consistent communication grows even more rapidly.
In the 2016-2017 budget proposal is a request for a part-time Communications Specialist, someone who can give vision to the ways we communicate with the congregation and with each other, who can give our website a face-lift, and who is uniquely gifted in various forms of communication. It may seem that the Communications Specialist would not directly benefit Youth Ministries, but I believe that the CS would actually most directly benefit Youth Ministries, as we have the greatest amount of information that needs to be communicated to the congregation. I urge you, as you are considering your pledges, to remember that essential pieces of the puzzle like this one require more of our treasure to support them, and I ask that you join me in prayer that the right solution to our communications needs would come to fruition.
End rant...
Stewardship is no fun to talk about, no fun to write about. But I believe we have an opportunity here to share our stories:
How has Unity Presbyterian Church blessed you this year?
How have you contributed to its ministries?
What is one way, in time, talent, or treasure, that you can give differently for the 2016-2017 school year?
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